Divorce
I can't imagine the hardships that are faced by the many families having to go through this awful process. There are so many factors to these hardships and I would like to talk about a few things that I have learned about and that I have seen in my life.
Unfortunately I have some very close friends that went through a divorce. It's hard because it seems like there is nothing wrong on the outside, but with divorce there is always something going on behind the scenes.
I can't be 100% sure on the reasons for the divorce of my friends, but I have a hunch that my friend may have been seeking to fill emotional holes without consulting her husband about them or attempting to work on them or fill them together. With divorce sometimes there are difficult situations where your partner may not be willing to even talk about anything or about the reasons why. Some of the best things we can try to do to save the marriage is serve your spouse.
Many times with divorce one party is looking for justification. When there is arguing and fighting during the divorce process it allows one party or the other to say "See how he/she is reacting? She's just crazy and wont listen to anything I say."
For this exact reason its important that if we want to save the relationship we stop looking at their flaws and remember all the reasons you married them in the first place. Something as stressful as divorce will always bring out sides of us or our spouse that we have never seen. Especially when infidelity is involved. This doesn't mean that you can't come back from it though. The person you loved is still in there.
Divorce is one of the most selfish acts that can happen between two individuals. Especially if children are involved. Our fist priority should be the children and their well being. For example, my friends had 2 girls together, when they filed the divorce they where ages 15 and 13. Both took the divorce pretty hard. It's been painful to see some of the choices they are making now, which I believe are the separations fault. Many times children will blame themselves for the divorce and carry those misunderstandings and insecurities with them for the rest of their lives.
We should always remember that we can find happiness again and think about those who are being affected in each situation. Of course there are sometimes when your safety or the safety of your children are at stake, in which case whats necessary should be done. Just don't forget the importance of family in each of our lives. We carry whatever problems we may have had in the first marriage into the second.
Unfortunately I have some very close friends that went through a divorce. It's hard because it seems like there is nothing wrong on the outside, but with divorce there is always something going on behind the scenes.
I can't be 100% sure on the reasons for the divorce of my friends, but I have a hunch that my friend may have been seeking to fill emotional holes without consulting her husband about them or attempting to work on them or fill them together. With divorce sometimes there are difficult situations where your partner may not be willing to even talk about anything or about the reasons why. Some of the best things we can try to do to save the marriage is serve your spouse.
Many times with divorce one party is looking for justification. When there is arguing and fighting during the divorce process it allows one party or the other to say "See how he/she is reacting? She's just crazy and wont listen to anything I say."
For this exact reason its important that if we want to save the relationship we stop looking at their flaws and remember all the reasons you married them in the first place. Something as stressful as divorce will always bring out sides of us or our spouse that we have never seen. Especially when infidelity is involved. This doesn't mean that you can't come back from it though. The person you loved is still in there.
Divorce is one of the most selfish acts that can happen between two individuals. Especially if children are involved. Our fist priority should be the children and their well being. For example, my friends had 2 girls together, when they filed the divorce they where ages 15 and 13. Both took the divorce pretty hard. It's been painful to see some of the choices they are making now, which I believe are the separations fault. Many times children will blame themselves for the divorce and carry those misunderstandings and insecurities with them for the rest of their lives.
We should always remember that we can find happiness again and think about those who are being affected in each situation. Of course there are sometimes when your safety or the safety of your children are at stake, in which case whats necessary should be done. Just don't forget the importance of family in each of our lives. We carry whatever problems we may have had in the first marriage into the second.
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